Friday, 13 July 2012

What's in a Name?

My Mother was always "Mum or Mummy", she would have hated being a "Mom or Mommy". Perhaps for this very reason I have chosen to go with Mommy and always sign it, with an 'o' in it, although I also get called "Muu-uum" and I don't object to the 'u' version either. However what I am not liking at all is what many of M's friends at primary school have adopted.......... "Mumma".

I am NOT a Mumma. I'm not entirely sure why I hate this so much, possibly there is some connection to the fact I am unhappy at being overweight, but M has fallen into doing this twice today and is likely to get a clip round the ear if he does it again! Be warned, young Padawan.

Tell me, what are you called or what did you call your Mum? Is it just me?

and while I am on the subjects of Moms, 

What makes a good Mommy/Mummy?

Is it about being hip, cool and relaxed or firm, disciplined and controlling? Is it about going out to work to provide nice things and enable all kinds of clubs and opportunities or staying at home,spending "quality" time and teaching how to manage without? Is it about nagging them to get their homework done and being strict about no play time until the chores are done or letting them find out for themself the consequences of not handing in the work on time?

Is it possible to be always approachable and a good listener on every subject from puberty to racism aswell as someone whose standards dictate that certain things are just not acceptable. Yes, love is absolutely the most important thing, but is it possible for your kids to always believe that's how you feel when they also need discipline?

Someone once wrote "being a mother is a little challenging at times, but just keep calm and stay patient". Oh boy, that has to be one of the BIGGEST understatements of all times - a little challenging!! There are times I'm convinced that Ban-ki Moon can't have the disputes to manage that I do.

Tonight I am struggling to be a good Mommy, instead I am a cross Mommy! M put on a brand new T-shirt tonight to go out to the Cricket club for an hour or so and within 2 hours of putting on said T-shirt it looks like this:-

 Now if I didn't know any better I'd think the moths had got to it, but are they really that quick? There are also holes in the dark section which aren't as visible. Now, I know this T-shirt only cost £2.00 from Tesco (sadly that probably means it was made by someone M's age, 8), but that's really not the point, (the price I mean, not the slave labour). It was BRAND NEW on and he's only worn it for less than 2 hours. If the deterioation were to continue at that rate, he would be naked within a week!! I can't afford an additional £2.00 per week on T-shirts!!

I haven't shouted, although I have expressed my sadness about the situation, in particular the lack of concern shown after it was pointed out, which really wound me up. I'm biteing my tongue and quietly seething inside. Hopefully now I've vented slightly, I can act like a good Mommy and explain why this shouldn't happen again "in a nice way". Unfortunately, that won't repair the T-shirt. Grrrr!!

Lots of Love Arwedd xx


  1. My two call me "Mama"...I have no idea where they got it from (probably a cartoon) but anyway it stuck and I find it quite cute. When I do something they disapprove of then I am "Mother" as in "do you intend to actually go OUT wearing those Crocs Mother?" I'd mend his top, badly, very visibly in very girly pink embroidery thread I think.... LOL

    1. I like that much better than Mumma and I'm loving your repair ideas, maybe I could attach an applique flower over the spot!!

      Arwedd xx

  2. I was Mummy, now I'm Mum and sometimes D calls me Helen!! I ignore the Helen until he says Mum lol. Could the t-shirt have a fault in it? How about a boy type patch over it. If the holes are because of bad boy behaviour I'd be annoyed too. I've no idea what makes a good Mum - C will say I'm not - she's at an awkward age so there's lots of arguing at the moment lol. You're a good Mum - your blog shows that, have faith in yourself, the boys love you :]]

  3. My elder daughter (24) calls me Mim, my younger daughter(almost 17) calls me Mum or Mummy. They tell me that I've been a good Mum- I've always been open and honest with them , and they've been able to discuss anything with me,but they've also known that there are boundaries and things J and I will and won't accept They've grown into wonderful young women and I'm very proud of both of them. It was a very satisfying moment when K got her first teaching post shortly after becoming engaged.She's happy, settled and a good person - J and I felt that it was a case of 'job done'.

  4. I'm a mum, a mummy when something is wanted. I hate "muh", have never been called that but have heard it around.
    Re; t-shirt: make it into a project to do with M...a "play" t-shirt that looks rough and ready but in fact is designed that way...
    Take some contrast material and sew a patch underneath the holes so the contrast shows through. Then use a grater on two other places and repeat so this looks like a pattern. Just an idea, but I know he likes making things with you..

  5. I've always been mummy and now mum. Don't be so hard on yourself about whether you deal with things the right way. We all deal with things differently and you know your children better than anyone so you know how to deal with them. I can't tell where the holes are on the t shirt but could you put a fabric badge over it so it can still be worn. At the end of the day we all have to learn lessons in life and your son had to learn that he needs to take care of his things. It doesn't matter if you have loads of money or none, respect is something all children need to learn. Enjoy your children the time passes too quickly and believe you me there are plenty of times I've shouted we're only human after all. Hope you have a lovely weekend. Ali x

  6. I was Mummy, now I'm Mum. Or Maman if the girl is feeling witty! My Uncle always called my Nanna Mam! As in Spam! And there we go - I had a nanna, ( mum's mum ) a nanny ( dad's mum ) and my great gran was Grandma! So I think in a good ten years or so I'd like to be a Nanna. But there are some lovely nicknames for Grandparent's around. My pet hate is granny! Ugh! I am never EVER going to be a granny!

    PS You are a BRILLIANT mum x

  7. I'd suggest that M buys his next T shirt out of his own pocket money.
    I've always been Mum.
    Love from Mum!

  8. Glad to see no-one is a Mumma, only nice names and thanks ladies for the advice re: the T-shirt.

    Angela, never heard of Bondaweb, is it like double sided tape, only iron on? Will have to get some.

    I have calmed down a bit now, but decided next time M should go without any T-shirt on, lol !! ;-0

    Arwedd xx